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Gibberish

發表於 : 週三 7月 28, 2010 11:31 am
余學林
試追一年情詩─Gibberish

I am just a dreamer, and you are distant.
You are a distant dreamer, and I am just a dream.
I dream of you, distant dreamer.
I dream a distant dreamer in my dream.
You are just a dream and I am a dreamer.
Are we both dreamers and distant?
I dream of you, knowing you do not dream of me.
A dream whispered. My dream. With you. Distant.
I dream of your distant. And mine.
I am just a dreamer, and I miss you dearly.

初稿 2010/03/08

Re: Gibberish

發表於 : 週五 7月 30, 2010 2:28 am
ZY
small error?
2nd to the last line. "distant" should be either "being distant" or "distance".

Re: Gibberish

發表於 : 週五 7月 30, 2010 2:57 pm
余學林
Yeah, it is an intended error. I knew it was an adjective, but I didn't want to use "distance" because I have only used the word "distant" (I wanted to limit the vocab). I could always make the title "Gibberish" as my excuse for having a grammatical error... I will think about it. Maybe I should use "being distant".

"I dream of you being distant. And me."
Hmm, this could work...

Thanks!!圖檔